Wednesday, August 25, 2010

A Kansas Introduction-- The Address Confidentiality Program

{ my 1st post on this site—please enjoy as most of the posts coming will be hard to digest as I specialize in Battered MOTHERS who have lost custody of their Children to the ABUSERS via the Court System that was SUPPOSED to PROTECT—but in fact has miserably failed thousands of Victims of Violence—Coercive Control- a human rights issue--the mothers, the children- many have not survived and the genocide only continues—to all the countless survivors/victims I am with you—and you are not alone—I and countless others are with you—all my love—Claudine} and  Please visit

For today---
Safe at Home logo
The Address Confidentiality Program- While picking up RX Drug

This afternoon I went to pick up my meds —you know that 2.50 generic program—I’m on social security disability 100% and anyways  it covers nothing- My Dr. told me about  the basic generic programs via pharmacies such as Walgreen Wal-Mart  and others for-- e.g.  Antibiotics -anti-inflammatory (the list of approved generic price drugs (check with your pharmacists about this they will give you a list) for the $2.50 drugs covered. Here is one I pulled for Wal-Mart—but all pharmacies offer a list. ASK THEM or your DR. they will help you.


When I was there picking up my RX for antibiotic related to degenerative bone disease—the little cashier so polite asks my name—confirms date of birth— confirms phone number—you know the usual stuff that goes into computers--then confirms my address. Huh? (she gives an address on file)  Nope that is not my address,  I say ‘never heard of it’—so she wants my address—I give her my dl has a p.o box on it—as you see I am on the Safe at Home-- address safe confidentiality programthis is my address—I live in a box. I explained to this pretty young lady (not much older than my daughter I think to mysef)
Kansas is K.S.A  74-451 just one of Several states that utilize this program. Nationwide directory here.

Well--- I am used to people saying ‘Federal Law Mandates we have a physical address” blah blah-- I am also used to saying ‘This is my address’—I hear the next common reply—“but we will keep it safe” I follow with my norm—‘this is my address’ I am on the Sah, ACP Program through the secretary of state administered by the Kansas Attorney General  spew ( I know by heart.).

Never give your physical address to any one ladies not any one not the cops not any one—once enrolled in the program your physical address is the attorney generals address at least here in Kansas. Stay OFF THE GRID or you will be found.

Then, after the pharmacist says ‘ok’—use her address on her DL’--cool --and as this sweet young lady is ringing me up—she bursts into tears—
“How do I get on it?-Can anyone get on it?”—(ah man I think)—and I know that the state coalition and even worst the old battered women’s task force (now the empowerment center)-sued by men so it changed its name-- sigh) is about worthless—so I direct her to the state its self and the director of KCSDV and the AG

The SaH ACP is in most states another question this young lady asked me—“does my credit card bills etc go there?”-- she asks?  She is not married no children so she has a good chance of surviving— and plans to leave the state. {I and many more have children who are held captive—and will be the main content of this blog- although all that I post will be helpful to any one in out or ongoing a stalking or coercive control situation}

The thing that I want to emphasize is that The States ACP program guarantee only one thing—Your Address—that’s it—they do not have any other resources no homes to get in via the acp—no creative ideas for address no further instructions—its up to you the survivor—this only gives you.. your address is confidential. {There is a whole array of new issues to deal with that. A whole other post.}
Another and perhaps easier way is to get a federal express address or a UPS address   Your New Home address is a street—not a box J--- Kewl huh???—They give a name like 1234 park avenue lane so it’s not a box—which in my case as I am a PO BOX—(and causes so many red flags Like above)—But I am old  and have been off grid since 2000. Only in 2007 did Kansas make Law the SaH ACP program and I was simply  ‘grandfathered in’.

To take it further I highly recommend getting the Times Up book it is available on this site for immediate electronic download.

To the Young Lady I met this afternoon—you have my number—and God Speed baby. And Please Visit Susan Murphy Milano for more info and Times UP! How to STAY SAFE honey!!

Friday, May 14, 2010

Insanity? Nope. Family Court in Kansas

Imagine that your home was broken into, vandalized and burglarized one night. You were roughed up and tied up while he ransacked your home. Fortunately, he left you shaken and hurt, but not seriously injured such as to require hospitalization. You were successfully able to identify him and his vehicle as he sped away.

Upon your call to the police, the offender is apprehended with the goods in his possession and brought to court to stand trial for his crimes against you.

You arrive in court and the first thing the judge asks you is if you are willing to go to mediation with the burglar. When you refuse, the judge labels you ‘uncooperative’ and ‘hostile’ to the burglar's continued relationship with you. Even though the burglar was caught red-handed with your goods, and you were an eye witness to the crime, the judge now decides that he can't possibly decide the case without first appointing a social worker termed a "burglary evaluator" to assess yours and the burglar's relationship.

When the social worker/evaluator can not determine what is best for your relationship or your stolen goods, they ask the judge to have both you and the burglar psychologically evaluated, because you seem "anxious", "angry" and "uncooperative" with the burglar. The court-appointed psychologist, who has no experience in being the victim of violent crime and has not studied the
effects of such trauma, also determines that you are uncooperative, hostile, anxious, and you
have a negative opinion of the burglar that can't be healthy. After all, the burglar had nothing but good things to say about you, your home and your belongings during his evaluation.

The psychologist recommends that you be restricted from access to your belongings until you can accept the burglar's rightful relationship to continued access to your home and personal effects. He further recommends you attend weekly conjoint therapy with the burglar to work on being more cooperative with him in the future.
All at your expense of course.

The judge decides to wait a year or so to see how you work through your relationship with the burglar before he can decide upon the burglary conviction. He chastises you that you had better really work at the relationship or he may just grant the burglar's request to maintain sole ownership of your property. None of these "experts" can be sued civilly for their negligence and incompetence because they have judicial or quasi-judicial immunity.

Insanity? Nope. Family court in Kansas.

Domestic violence victims walk into family court to ask a judge to protect their children from a known abuser. Instead, they face the above-described nightmare that can span years and put them into financial ruin, mental and emotional exhaustion, not to mention directly back into the path of the abuser. Judges pressure them to mediate, assign a custody evaluator who pressures them to accept 50/50 joint physical and legal custody with theirs and their children's abuser.

They and their children are put through psychological evaluations by persons with little to no training in domestic violence, and some judges force co-parenting therapy and reunification therapy upon mother and child with their perpetrators. If they can not fit into the mold of cooperative "co-parenting" and the children continue to be reluctant to visit with the man that abused them, they face losing custody to him.

We have spent millions of dollars printing brochures and making public service announcements to victims of domestic violence encouraging them to leave violent relationships and telling them of the harmful effects on their children.

But when they do get the courage to leave, the same system tells them they are wrong to try to protect their children once they have divorced their abuser, and that they should now fully and freely support unsupervised visitation with the same dangerous person. Contrary to popular belief, children of batterers can be at just as much risk psychologically, sexually, and even physically after the couple splits up as they were when the family was still together. In fact, many children experience the most damaging victimization from the abuser at this point.

Most people assume that a fit mother never loses custody. If only that were true. The American Judges Association reports that "Studies show that batterers have been able to convince authorities that the victim is unfit or undeserving of sole custody in approximately 70% of challenged cases." Unfortunately, the state of Kansas’s current laws also says that none of these people can be held accountable, either.

And so we go on, handing down family violence from one generation to the next...

KMFCJ-founded by Claudine Dombrowski,a Protective Parent and survivor of Domestic Violence and systemic abuse. The goals of KMFCJ is to publish informed news releases, links and commentaries relating to protective parents and their children who continue to be victimized by the abuser and or the court system.  [a special thanks to Paige Hodson-Alaska Mothers For Custodial Justice]